It’s weird.  These days, I don’t blog as much as I used to.  When I started this journal back in high school ten years ago, I was writing something nearly everyday.  Then when I went to McGill, it sometimes increased to a couple of times a day.  These days, I’m lucky if it happens once a month.  I want to say there’s a reason for this, but regretfully, I don’t think there is, other than that with age comes a search for relevancy instead.  Rather than talk about “who said what” in the confines of South Windsor High School, I’ve been able to step back and mature with the technology.

I suppose time increases the amount of introspection one can force on himself.  It’s nearly midway through December, which means it’s also time for things like my top 10 albums of 2007, and other nonsensical musings on the year.  Most of all though, time leads into become prospectivity in seeking out answers for the future.  If there’s anyone who has a harder time dealing with uncertainties, it’s me.

This upcoming 18 months or so is going to present massive challenges and turning points in my life, with everything from MBA graduation in May, to career speculation, to anticipation of a wedding in 2009.  The likes of these changes will probably affect the next 20 years of my life.  What is a 25-year old to do and how is he supposed to do it?

Habitually, I would go about reading more non-fiction about the way the world works.  But right now, the opportunities to do such are slim.  I suppose that’s why I find more solace in music by artists like Radiohead, whose abstract lyrics try to evoke a contemplative spirit.  I also like to talk to tourists from foreign countries.  It places your sense of your place in the world.

It’s just as easy to live on the superficial side of YouTube, Bravo reality programming, or dinners at Friday’s and awkward trips to Jersey.  But it’s more enriching when, every once in a while, you take the time to spew out some self-worth drivel, reassuring yourself and others that in the aging process, you’ve shown a modicum of growth.

I guess in any case, it works best when people understand more about themselves than meets the mind’s eye.  I don’t need to be Sartre, but I don’t need to be Spears either.  Life is heavy (still waiting for a new thesis advisor so I can get rolling), but good…