halloween @ 100%
Presenting Smalrus Abstracts Folio 3- Ambient Moods
30/10/03(1105pm)- supermayor tremblay...(james we love you :))
(115am)- been a couple days since i last updated. not much going on but busy. ed board, french stuffs, hw, congratulations to new ssmu president kate rhodes, who won the by-election this evening and will be leaving us tribbies.... :'( we'll miss you kate. still reading no logo and also prescription pot- which is the story of one of the 7 guys who is federally legally allowed to smoke marijuana. its quite interesting. gotta write a french composition on whether i think it should be legal or not. thats about it? um last night was the 24 premiere. i wrote an article on it in the trib. personally i think it coulda been better, but i suppose we'll see. could use some cake. and also ideas on what to be for halloween.
26/10/03(105am)- not much going on. an hour from now is turn back your clocks. yay north american time. :p um i just watched snl best of tracy morgan and now its the snl classic. um, not much doing today. habs lost. last night went to a party where a lot of tribbies were at. good times. hadnt been to a party nor drank in a while. ed board yesterday, im writing this weeks editorial on ssmu daycare budget. went to a council meeting, that was about it? anyways, tomorrow im in the office doing set reading, schoolwork, layout, stuff like that. just waxing intellectual/philosophical with margaret. when we get to something good, ill elaborate...
23/10/03(1035pm)- again not much to report, just schoolwork, editing, poetry writing, missing, habs win to make it 5-2-0-0, our best start in years. did laundry, starting no logo, writing poetry, writing articles. council is boring? randomness. where is keef? no reply? discombobulated. a poem i wrote yesterday:
gray skies
white flag
and coffee cream in little plastic cups
that never go bad when unrefrigerated
notes peek through my headphones from laser amplified plastic
through wire and more plastic
open book
tee shirts of every colour
and I awoke in a french mood
like apple pies and vanilla wafers
enzymatic and absorbed in cell tissue
the bookstore across the street
six lanes
and open until ten o'clock
She's got red-streaked hair that only makes sense in the city
i found out that the quebecois call a mullet "un coupe longueuil"
not "un mulle" like their french counterparts
two girls, hands clasped, again it only makes sense in the city these days
she's pretty, she's pretty, she's pretty, old but pretty
im not that young anymore myself
sparkling diamond and I had a dream about smoking
and getting lost in ozzy osbourne's restaurant looking for the washroom
sharon was cackling at me
gray skies
gray matter
gray area
that I always come back to, like you
or her or her or her but you
i bought a new cd and another and another and another
and no matter how many i bought
they sing the words better than me
he labelled it the "honeymoon phase"
and as much as it makes sense, sometimes you figure it out
it was funny that time the seagull attacked my french fries
or I duct taped the hole in the crotch of my pants
but maybe that's just me
because I'm not good at saying the words like I am writing them
and I can't believe I missed the doctor this morning
or the man in the mechanical wheelchair soliciting sympathy donations
the blond over there is cute, she has nice eyes
i never dated a blond
the dude with the afro has braces
too old?
and shakes hands like every other guy, shake, fold, snapoff, popoff
living life biculturally, it's now integrated and incorporated into my system
and my stream of consciousness is now of two identities
ciel couvert
drapeau blanc
21/10/03(1115am)-
Verbosity is too much
There are big words that mean nothing
Little words that mean everything
But...
It's all in words.
Have actions always spoke louder than words?
The gift of a rose?
A kiss on the cheek?
Has it ever mattered more?
Communication is the key to life
Not how you communicate it
But what you communicate
For if the world is just a stage,
Then we are its actors
If we are its actors,
Then it's all in the timing
And the way we use words.
20/10/03(1115pm)- lot on the head. lot not said. lot of time editing and other stuff. habs won again. dont have anything else i wanna talk about now.
19/10/03(1150pm)-its been almost 7 hours since i got to sit down at quark to start editing, but i finally got these for A&E pages done. you dont realise how much layout is worth til you have to do it. its like interior design. your outdoor architecture is beautiful, but unless it flows inside, creating ease of movement through the building, then your outdoor architecture is irrelevant. grammar and spelling and capitalisations are important. but if theres no visual flow to the story, it just looks ridiculous and hard to read. that said, im wrapping up tonights work and all the mcgillies better like this weeks arts section :-P
(415pm)- lets see. from last time... yesterday i woke up early and went to my EU simulation. not as fun as brynen's peacebuilding simulation from last year, but definitely engaging. i learned something from both simulations: actors, when left to their own idiosyncratic devices, will tend to engage themselves in a natural manner that is irrespective of how prior background leads to said event. negotiations are made on a personal manner that is naturally and intuitively based in agreement with personal accordances. this leads to a shift to events that are not predicted and a restructuring of views by all actors. the result is that all actors involved end up with a different result than the one they originally intended.
the simulation ended at 5 and then i met up with dany and we went to see the habs-leafs game. excellent game and we played really well. rolled with punches and doled out some of our own. we lost 1-0 but it was also jean béliveau night, which was cool. and we had really good seats that he got for free from his uncle. so i was glad to see my first game this year. looks like we've got a decent year ahead of us and we're 3-2 right now, so thats not bad. better than last seasons opening. got home round 1030 and was gonna go out but ended up not. so i was looking for my manchester honda pen but i couldn't. until after i needed it. i ended up going to cafe depot to write movement 2 since its that time of moneth. movement 2 came out interesting when you realise that i had to keep recurrent themes from the first opus, plus my new reflections on this month's movement. anywatys, im pleased with it.
this morning i woke up late again and then went to the trib office, where im at now doing some set edits and then tonight im doing a french composition. and thats pretty much it. not much doing today. or this week. and ive finallly got a full week in which theres not various papers, not various exams or midterms or anything like that due. it should be a relatively boring week then i guess. but then, when you live my life, i guess nothing becomes as boring as it seems. more later...
(130am)- "Movement 2, ('October 18')"
18/10/03(110am)- it was about a week ago right now. i dont know whats gone on in that last week but its been a week. sometimes somethings just dont add up. and for this weekend, thats for sure...:-/
Troubled words of a troubled mind
I try to understand what is eating you
I try to stay awake but it's 58 hours since that I last slept with you
What are we coming to?
I just don't know anymore
Blame it on the black star
Blame it on the falling sky
Blame it on the satellite
That beams me home
~radiohead
17/10/03(1230am)- about what i said about baseball though... 1918. thats all that needs to be said.
16/10/03(730pm)- weird, ive been updating the same time the last 3 days. and i havent even been consciously doing it. last night after dinner, i went to cafe depot to do some work for arab-israeli conflict. and then david came around 1230 in the am and we worked til 2am and went home. did some more work til around 330 and then i dunno, went to bed. woke up around 830 and then did whatever. and then was my 10am french test. that went so-so. some of the stuff was just plain stupid on the test. after that was my arab-israeli conflict midterm. went like so:
Part A. Answer One.
1. The concepts, protracted conflict, crisis, war, and peace can all be applied to the Arab/Israel domain. In fact, these concepts illuminate this conflict in ways that differ from historical analysis. Drawing on one or more readings and lectures, a) define these concepts b) specify their relationships and c) illustrate how they shed light on the Arab-Israel conflict.
2. According to Spiegel, "The international system, the bureaucracy congress and interest groups account for the constant picture, but the limit [US] policy; they do not define it. Only by examining the attitude of the presidential elite do we understand why and how policy changes." Based upon US policy toward the Arab-Israeli conflict since 1947, assess this interpretation.
3. Not only do Arabs and Israelis perceive their protracted conflict through a different lens- its origins, the core issues in dispute, their goals, and the optimal means of attainment. They also differ among themselves, revealing several schools of thought. Discuss. Focus on Arab OR Israeli schools.
Part B. Answer Three.
a) Hussein-McMahon Letters (1915) OR Balfour Declaration (1917) OR Peel Commission Report (1937)
b) UNSCOP Recommendation OR UN General Assembly Resolution 181 (1947)
c) Tripartite Declaration (1950)
d) Johnson Plan on Jordan Waters (1953-5)
e) Key provisions of PLO National Covenant regarding Israel (1964) OR Arafat's Declaration of Independence (1988)
f) The 'Road Map' to Peace (2002)
anyways, i did A1, then B a b and f. it was fairly easy. stopped into the office and then went to another boring eu lecture of which haskel has turned me off to the subject. she spends too much time on IR and i hate IR. met up with david, came home, watched matrix reloaded finally and now its time for hockey. also the yankees are playing the sox tonight. would suck if they lost, but hockey's got more of my attention now. as for what comes of the rest of the evening or tomorrow, who knows. i sent some stuff to alan for review. we'll see what he says...
15/10/03(730pm)- sometimes i forget how good the bends is. ive been listening to a lot of pre-kid a radiohead as of late (since i got into them at that time) and i must say, they did phenomenal. and when you realise how much they're fundamentally radiohead and yet their sound continues to evolve, its awesome. ive taken to trying to play them into my keyboard with my guitar too.
had a drs appt today and then went to the office for a little bit to do some work and then to depot to study for tomorrows arab-israeli exam. so yeah, ive got an arab-israeli exam tomorrow and also a french test. and then EU with the ever wonderful haskel. anyways. habs won their home opener last night 5-1. w00t w00t. new travis good, new string cheese is interesting. yankees game on, but i care very limitedly. hockey piques my interest. crappy weather out, rainy then windy. really windy. ooh and a punk riot last night on st. denis and rene levesque outside le medley. cars flipped and burnt. by punk, i mean those with mohawks, studded jackets and pitbulls. not the pop-punk blink 182 good charlotte i love your daughter and feel like my parents are keeping me down... thats about it for now, ive got work to do.
scribble scribble
scratch scratch
scribble scratch
scratch scribble scribble I
Xdit wXat I _ometim_s
Say
Not what I
feel
14/10/03(730pm)- ***backlogged update from yesterday follows...***
so we're driving back from ct on 87 through vt. and all of a sudden, 10 miles from the border, the car starts revving but deccelerating but theres gas in the car. so we get out and check the oil but the oil is fine. so we check the transmission fluid and theres none. we dont have a funnel and the transmission is buried under the engine (its a 1989 vw cabriolet- tiny). so we macgyver up this funnel using dasani water bottle, hanger cardboard piping (you know the cardboard on wire hangers?), plastic bags and hair elastic. turn on the car and start going but the problems not fixed- we're riding 1st gear, 30mph along the shoulder of the highway into this town, swanton vt. its now 6pm and the garage is closing. so the mechanic takes the car around and says the transmission is shot. the guy who specialises in volkswagons- he doesnt open til 8am and devin has midterms today. so then we're trying to figure how we're gonna get back to montreal. we see a border patrol car go around the mcdonalds so we flag him down, but he blows right by us. now what? we decide that katherine and zoya will find the hotel near the gas station and take my laptop so they could dial out and email their profs and devin and i would hitchhike back to montreal... across the border.
we all go to the gas station across the street, which is still open, and start soliciting for rides from people with quebec license plates (since we assume they'd only be going back to mtl or atleast enroute). so the first woman we ask- shes really nice but obviously skeptical but she asked us where we go to school and we told her mcgill and shes like, "well.... alright, i'm a mcgill alum too, so i'll take you in if you dont mind getting dropped off at the lionel groulx metro station." so we're talking in the car about language and whatnot (she was an ESL major and she teaches ESL to immigrants here in mtl), she dropped us off and we came home. the girls stayed overnight at some local motel for a ridiculous 80$ a night. turns out, her car was missing a part (the governor?) that it needed that it never got when her ct mechanic rebuilt her transmission. which explained why her car sometimes just wouldnt start if you turned it off. they got it fixed and drove back today. but that my story. i hitchhiked :-D.
other than that, it was a pleasant ride home- i wrote some more poetry, thought about stuff, came back and found out that our deputy editor, kate, is running for ssmu prez, so shes on trib leave of absence. and today was back to classes and trib staff/edboard meetings. as for everything else in life- who knows, we'll see tomorrow... tonight though, its habs home opener/cooking dinner/matrix reloaded/work...more eventually.
13/10/03(910am)- i awoke this morning to U2's "One" playing on the radio. i like the lyrics to that song. "we're one, but we're not the same, we've got to carry each other, then we'll do it again." thats the kind of theme thats been running through my head all weekend. saturday was a real iffy day, brought out by a lot of talking yet no solving. but yesterday i woke up feeling better and i felt like things turned around. i felt like for the first time since july, i could laugh again. semantic logic would say that if we're one, but we're not the same, then if we're the same, then we're not one. we're not the same. but it goes past logic and into the heart. for, for all practical purposes, feelings know no logic. and theres no logical or rational way to explain the way anyone feels- why we laugh or why we cry. yesterday was a good day. and maybe today in the last few hours, it'll be realised that the soul is distinct from the mind. and the soul is what drives us in life. what music we feel like listening to, what clothes we feel like wearing, what we feel we should be as careers, what we feel our goals are, who we are, and who we love. its all driven by something instinctive, something that doesnt come from on top but within.
11/10/03(520pm)- and yet sometimes, i sit here and cant help but wonder, what would my life be like and how would i have turned out if i was at uconn (or elsewhere) instead of mcgill...
(1110am)-yesterday, long day. long long day. and the details about it may never be known. atleast not for the moment. paper articles are either not there or are coming in late. meanwhile im not really able to edit. elise is taking the sats this morning. good luck elise, you'll do great. oh yeah and thursday i got a haircut, but i think i neglected to mention that. anyways. yeah. this is going to prove to be an interesting weekend, starting with last night. and this morning. like, i dont wanna do simulation paper work right now because i have too many other things on my mind. i can easily feel poetry flowing through me again, but i dunno. i brought my book with me so i can write, although i couldnt find my manchester honda pen, which i like to use to write in it. anyways. i feel awkward. i feel scared. i feel like the situation is the reverse of what it was 3 months ago. sorry, not the situation as much per se, just the handling of it. i feel really good, yet really confused. and yet, the more i try, the more anxious i get. i know im rambling a lot now and im being vague and nebulous. maybe one day i be able to stop feeling this way and it'll just be clear. thats enough from me today. ive got work to do, poetry to write... :-/
10/10/03(110am)- ill update more in the morning. things to say: dont know what, did laundry, habs lost their opener :( EU sim position paper due sunday, readings to do any the likes. leaves album is my number one album of the year as of now. damien rice is good too. michael moore book is excellent. sometimes hes over propaganda, but lots of good points to think about. my new frontrunner for the election: wesley clark. says all the right things and cant possibly be knocked on "wartime president" argument. school of rock is still funny.
06/10/03(1100pm)- unfortunately, i was only at ....wait, 24 season preview commercial.... wow.....anyways i was only at services for around 2 hours, headed into trib office and had a lot of work. writers meeting went alright, ed board went alright. my story's on the front page of this weeks issue. anyways, on my way home, i met up with some random people who were going to break fast, so i ended up following with them to get vietnamese. really nice dinner and cool to not have to break fast by myself. its nice that the holidays are over so that i can get back to life again. and lsats are over. also, my pick for shortlist was wrong. it ended up going to damien rice. i had it in the back of my head but i wasnt sure that he would win but rather that it would have been cody chesnutt. but anyways, rice's album comes out here tomorrow so thats good. also out is new deal, leaves, string cheese, and michael moore's new book, dude, wheres my country?. anyways, not sure what else is going on. got a lot of work to do and never enough time. so im gonna go now, sleep some, work more, thats about it.
05/10/03(1000pm)-
Ashamnu We have become desolate.
Bagadnu We have betrayed.
Gazalnu We have stolen.
Debarnu dofi We have been hypocritical or deceptive.
Heyvinu We have made things crooked.
Vihirshanu And we have made others wicked.
Zadnu We have sinned intentionally.
Chamasnu We have been violent.
Tafalnu sheker We have become desensitized.
Yatznu ra We have given bad advice.
to all those whom i have wronged in the last year, for all those whom i have betrayed, whom ive stolen from, been deceptive or crooked; for all those whom i have turned bad or sinned against or been violent with, have become desensitized or given bad advice, please accept my apologies as i seek your forgiveness on this. in return, i forgive all for those who have wronged me. as this yom kippur fast symbolises the cleansing of our souls, i hope that everyone partaking in it has an easy fast and is sealed in the Book of Life for the next year. shanah tovah.
(1000am)-its morning now and im just as scared. scared like how do i look forward to this weekend when last night, well... went to see lost in translation the other day. really good. it was kinda dark and everything but it was a well done movie. then i also went to see school of rock. was very funny movie. you know a movie is good when you can see it by yourself and still find it funny. usually those types of movies only are funny when you see them with other people. it was kinda like mrs. doubtfire only better and with music. then yesterday morning was lsats. dunno how i did, but i wanted to go in with a no-stress attitude because i knew that wasnt going to be something which would help me. and of course trying to block out other things on my mind- that proved tough. afterwards, went to the trib office to do some work, came home, took a nap, and in the evening, david had his friend from new york up with some of his friends, so we went to bifteck but i saw katherine and zoya, so i joined them and their crew and was talking and then allison came with her visiting friends, so we were talking and that was basically it. we left bifteck around 215 and yeah. i was up til like 330 watching american chopper and snl reruns before i fell asleep. today i gotta go to the office and do some work, work on my french composition, tonight is kol nidre...i dunno what else i wanted to say. i think wed and thursday were unaccounted for, but i dunno, just not happy...
(230am)- im scared. just a little scared. would rather not have to think things, would rather the situation be different. not happy this evening. worried and scared. :-( things to talk- school of rock, lsat, out this evening, stuff like that. i cant remember what else. more tomorrow...
I got a hole in me now
I got a scar I can talk about
She keeps a picture of me in her apartment in the city
But some things in this world
Man, they don't make sense
Some things you don't leave until they leave you
And then the things that you miss, you say
Baby, baby, baby when all your love is gone
Who will save me from all I'm up against out in this world
And maybe, maybe, maybe
You'll find something that's enough to keep you
But if the bright lights don't receive you
You should turn yourself around and come on home
01/10/03(540pm)- i now have an editors portfolio set up on the tribune website. just go to spencerross.portfolio.mcgilltribune.com and all my articles will now be archived there. this includes the boy interview and my first editorial on media conglomeration. im finally getting better from my cold. it was pretty bad but im on the tailend now. for the holidays, we went to westmount to shaar hashomayim and walked back an hour. novick sent me 2 songs from the iron horse show- live in style and the cover of u2 where the streets have no name. got the new john mayer cd. its slightly better, less absorbed than the first one. i dislike him as a person, in fact i detest him as a person, but i give him credit for being musically talented. um, we went to see lewis black and mitch hedberg, two of my favourite comedians. was great. lots of humour. um, not much else to write about now i guess, its a busy couple weeks coming up. looking forward to weekends. especially in a couple weekends. also, i think i started my next folio of abstracts. this one is more ambient oriented designs.
