The Smalrus

30/09/01 (11pm)-in addition to the travis review, i also updated the links page as well.  some of them were outdated so i fixed them.

a little more respectable timing on my update today.  first off, my tentative final exam dates for this semester are french history- fri, 7 dec. 9am; gov't of canada- mon, 17 dec. 2pm; macroeconomics- wed, 19 dec. 9am.  i love how mcgill administration loves to schedule my exams so ri-damn-diculously far apart.  whats with the 10 days between exams bullshit, its just like last december, make for a short winter break.

so thursday was yom kippur day and dave and i went to evening services at hillel.  services seemed rather lengthy for some reason and lack of food made my arm strength nil.  my arm muscles were hurting just to keep the book up.  and the fast went rather well until the last 2 hours when i finally started to feel it in my stomach.  but afterwards we went to dani's house for a potluck, although because of services, dave and i showed up late, so there wasnt much food left at all.  so instead, dave and i walked to fattouche and got ourselves shish taouk and falafel and then headed home.  i do believe i passed out on the couch watching tv and eating ramen.  and by the time 5am came, i woke up off the couch, finished the ramen, and put myself to bed.

friday was minus gov't of canada, due to conferences instead, so i didnt have to get up until french class.  ho hum.  she was talking about something, i dont even remember, some stuff on impératif, our oral presentation we have to do and then who knows what.  i got to do my homework for that class tonight.  and im starting to feel a cold coming on, which is weird cause i wasnt feeling it til about mid-day today.  anywho, after french was lunch with nick at shatner, then macroecon.  but vicas off in another world again and jared wasnt there so i have no idea what he was talking about.  i think he was talking about his car again but who knows.  jared and i started the vicas scoreboard to count his long pauses, his "uh"s and his off-topic conversations.  the numbers for all three are staggeringly high, yet apparently we're on track with the respectable syllabus he's got drawn up.  *shrug*  after econ, i went and did who knows what, probably flask shopping.  right, dave and i went flask shopping.  i ended up getting mine on saturday.  anywho, so we had our conversation in french that we needed to have and that was about it. then we went to archambault for some reason and i was immediately drawn to the musical instruments again and ended up buying a book of coldplay tabs.  if they come back to montreal, i am definitely getting tickets for that show because that is one of my favourite albums.  luckily i didnt buy anything else cause heaven help me, i woulda.  friday night was an eat-in night and i fell asleep on the couch again, watching a marx brothers' movie.  unfortunately, katherine left after french class to get to her next class so she didnt get my address (i knew something like that would happen), so she never ended up coming for dinner, which was really kinda depressing, but oh well.

saturday i woke up late and dave was burning homemade pancakes for him and john and nick and katherine (not french class katherine).  so after doing who knows what (i do a lot of that), i ended up going flask shopping and then going to the metropolis box office and get tix for the travis/remy zero concert for me and dave.  so we're hanging around here, playing travis' cd, playing my guitar etc and jet to subway for dinner.  after that, dave and i headed to metropolis for the concert.  as we walked up to the back, there were the tour buses.  cool stuff.  great concert.  read my review, they played really well.  we saw the lead singer of remy zero outside the tour buses after the show and i almost had him sign my setlist, but he was talking to his groupies (the nerve of the groupies).  and had we stuck around longer, we probably would have gotten to see travis as well, but we jetted and left for dre's party.  good party, lot of people there, some i recognized from dre's floor in molson.  by the time we got there, nick was loaded and so my friends thought it was kinda funny.  i guess he passed out there (we had already left around 3), and he came home around 9 this am.  leah was there, she came later with this guy, derek.  i think i figured it out.  of all women, i think the ones im most liable to find physically attractive are dark-eyed brunettes.  i mean think about it, sarah, angela, rishona, christine, etc...they're all dark-eyed brunette.  and so is leah.  hm... i mean there are exceptions, but...eh but shes one of those types of girls who has a really outgoing, bubbly personality, so she'd get nearly any guy.  but still, she is cute and pretty.  anywho, good party, even if dre was pissed at me cause i went to the travis concert and he wouldnt skip part of his own party to see his second favourite band behind dmb. :P

so things are going, dont know what this week brings other than classes, but whats cool is that the rane concert at rpi is becoming more real so long as no one's got midterms the next monday.  but jared said he'd go and since he lives in schenectady 20 min away, we'd stay overnight at his place.  that'd be awesome.  and i definitely have smalrus.com t-shirts ready for the concert if we go.

this saturday is a big hockey day and everyone i know should be watching a game.  of course, since none of my friends like hockey, that's asking too much.  for me, im going to see if i can grab some tix for the habs home opener against the leafs.  the leafs-habs game is a HUGE rivalry here, let alone, its the season opener.  hopefully we can even get scapled tix.  as for everyone else, they should be going to the int'l skating rink in newington on sat @ 8pm to see the mcgill redmen vs. the uconn huskies.  i mean what the hell, its only 1/2 hr from south windsor.  you cant support your team in one sport (basketball) and not support them in another...and besides, we aim to crush the doggypoop out of those hockey huskies.

anyway, work calls, sickness calls and come to think about it, those are the only things calling me these days besides my parents..

30/09/01 (315pm)-travis concert review on the reviews page.  more news pending...

27/09/01-ok, so i was off a day on my updates.  im trying to figure out how to piece apart the pages for conversion to php.  right now, im a little confused but its probably because im trying to figure a way to streamline the process for 150 pages.  eventually it shall be done, the php coding is a goal i plan on completing for this site because as i learn more about its capabilities, i plan on using some of them on the page (long term goal).  the switch over might not be as horrendous as its looking, but again, time consuming.  plus, people who have linked to specific *.html pages of the site will have to redo all their links to the *.php pages.  and although my original goal was to start recoding around now, it might have to wait til mid-late october after some of my midterms are over.  so onto the update.

hard to believe im getting back to my weekly updates, i guess maybe its to show ive got more a life to have something to write about rather than nothing to write about.  either that or it shows ive got less a life.  ok, so i sit around my computer too much but then again, i don't. the problem with doing it this way is that the stuff earlier in the week escapes me, so like, last wednesday and thursday i can't account for.  well actually, wednesday was day two of rosh hashanah services and i made sure that i wasnt lost again trying to find the synagogue.  it actually worked.  but honestly, i cant account for thursday other than going to classes and perhaps we all might have gone to st. sulpice or frappe or bifteck or something like that, dave and i might have shot pool, but i honestly dont remember that far.

friday, on the other hand, was another story.  after going to all my classes, and chilling, we then had some pasta for dinner and ended up going to meet the girls at kristins place to go to karaoke.  so it was dave and nick and seth and me, all had made white russians and screwdrivers, so by the time we got to their apartment, we were sorta buzzed (although i think my tolerance is building up because i was merely buzzed the whole night).  so it was the four of us, and debbie, kristin, kristins roommate jess, and this other girl surbhi, went to the atm and then to vocalz, this fairly classy karaoke bar.  drinks there were outrageously priced and they didnt tell you the price til after they made the drink (go figure).  it was a pretty fun night and somehow we guys ended up singing bohemian rhapsody just before i left.  fun shit.

that also got me thinking about doing another open mic night up here so theres a good chance ill try doing one either thanksgiving (columbus) day weekend, or the weekend after.  of course no one back home would come up to see it (go figure) and hopefully atleast my roommates will come.  not sure exactly when the date will be and where it'll be at, i need to see who does them regularly,  but ill probably do 3 songs, rane's for them, travis' sing, and possibly incubus' drive.

so saturday was the day that was the 6th anniversary of my haftorah for my bar mitzvah, so i was gonna do that at services at shul, but that kind of failed because apparently i spoke to the wrong rabbi in charge of that stuff and so someone else was arranged to do it.  i was quite disappointed cause ive done it 5 years in a row and they couldnt just concede it to me as a visitor. :(   they let me open the ark instead, so atleast i got some honour.  went home from shul, did i dont know what, and then actually, i cant even remember what went on that saturday night.  again we might have gone out but im not sure.  ah well, if it was that relevant, i might have remembered.

sunday was yet another ho hum day, atleast until dinner.  we went to main, which is this kosher style restaurant and all ate their for seths night to cook since he wasnt gonna be here this week.  oh right, sunday was also my day to grocery shop.  interesting...anywho, main was good, i had a poutine with smoked meat.  mmmm poutine.  that was about it for sunday night because of classes (although i believe it was sunday night that dave and i went to bifteck to shoot some pool and i beat him 2-1 which is an accomplishment for me.

monday it was back to class, going to the music store (bought a new capo and a slide) and then coming home to cook.  yet another great meal by me.  because i cooked meat the past two mondays, i decided to do a pasta dish and cooked homemade spinach gnocci with sauce and some green beans.  the dough wasnt hard to make, but rolling it into the gnocci was somewhat time consuming since i had made for four of us.  but it was excellent, although it coulda used like a tsp less of salt.  very heavy, very filling, mainly because it was made with mostly ricotta cheese and flour.  next week i shall venture to cook stuffed boneless chicken breasts, maybe with some homemade sort of sauce.  tomorrow night, katherine from my french class is gonna come over for dinner, so im either gonna make linguine and clam sauce or chicken marsala.  and who knows about dessert...  it it werent for clean up, cooking is fun...

tuesday was my late day of classes, where they're 1 1/2 hrs, and i hate that cause sitting and listening to lectures for that long at a time is tiring.  thank goodness for coffee.  after class, i went home, went back to aus office to pick up some tix from seth and came back.  john made chili for dinner so it was pretty good and nick and i left to meet phil at the molson centre for a preseason game between the habs and the detroit red wings.  great game but not until the third period.  théodore was really holding the team up.  we won in OT 3-2 and i was booing brendan shanahan for being a whalers traitor and brett hull for shafting my habs by signing with detroit.  serves them right.  the same export girls at the expos game were at the habs ex zone, and the really hot one was again, two sections down.  still no molson export shirt... during the first intermission, they were advertising this movie MVP2, in which a monkey skateboards, and in the first MVP, the monkey plays hockey, so they had the monkey come out in intermission and play 2 on 1.  the trainers kept feeding him the puck, but he just kept skating circles around the rink looking at the crowd.  finally, he scored and the crowd was cheering and so he skated more laps while they tried feeding him the puck, and then he sat down on centre ice.  ive seen everything now...a monkey on ice skates playing hockey...we also won last night, so that makes us 4-2 in the preseason.  the opener is here oct 6 against toronto, so that match is probably sold out and we might try and get scalped tix cause its such a big match.

speaking of tix, st. germain was apparently postponed til spring (just like they did last year), so im pissed about that unless they're planning on releasing a new album because i really wanted to see them.  so instead, i might see travis/remy zero on saturday and the string cheese incident later next month.  and of course theres still a possibility for a rane show at the end of next month at rpi.  

yesterday was a full load of classes, plus two conferences, our network in the house here was down all day cause theres something wrong with our cable modem, and i didnt get to watch the new star trek series because we dont get a upn station in our cable service.  that really pissed me off.  so hopefully my dad or someone's taping episodes for me because i wanna see it when i get home, i hear its really good.   seth went back to nyc, says canadian security is still iffy, laguardia had some lady dismantling her cell phone before boarding the plane.  got another haircut with some guy who was going apeshit with the clippers.   like he barely used scissors, he mainly used clippers, so that was a trip of a 20 min haircut.  but atleast it looks okay.   

we had a pretty good pre-fast dinner last night, courtesy of dave and now its yom kippur, day of atonement and a day of fasting (although most people dont understand the concept of a fast that doesnt eat food and water).  me so hungy.  dave and i ended up sleeping through morning services and so we're gonna go to evening services to hear the shofar blown.  ah that brings back memories of two years ago when some people tried to shut me up from blowing the shofar on the ct river with andrew and sarah.  man, that was such a weird time in my life and almost was the 180 in how life started to go.  like i always say, its funny how things end up.

tonight is also a potluck dinner at dani's, tomorrow is my date with katherine, saturday is travis/remy zero at metropolis and then house party at dre's, sunday is probably gonna be working and who knows from there.  i figure this will remind me of some of the important things id otherwise forget next time i get to write (watch me write tomorrow).

two more things, i ended up putting the full texts of the two new rane songs on my rane lyrics site.  i recommend people checking them out cause they're really beautiful, particularly the song "Somber Retreat" which i got to see during my jam with them and theres potential for a cello part in it.  the other thing is, im trying to make smalrus.com t-shirts.  i need a small 3x3 logo for the back.  they might be selling for 5$ but more than likely free as promotional items since im prolly gonna use hanes t-shirt iron-ons.

who knows when the next update will be, but atleast this one was sizeable...

25/09/01(11:45pm)-update coming tomorrow, including karaoke night, saturday services, prospects of an open mic night, spencer cooks dinner week 3, the habs game, smalrus.com t-shirts, and more...

18/09/01(7pm)-i gotta start moving over past reflections onto the monthly page.   particularly cause it makes it harder for people to know when ive updated since older updates move down. soon...soon...  it seems like not much has been done today, but then i was reading the bottom of a page in the machzor and it was a quote from the Zohar saying something like, do not sleep at night and think you have wasted the day.  very interesting.

its been an interesting day then i guess.  i was up early to go to shul and out the door onto the metro at 9.  get off atwater station where im supposed to get off to walk like 10 blocks to the synagogue.  so i submerge from underground and start walking.  and its getting more and more congested, the traffic.  finally, i reach the subway station near guy and i realise that ive been walking completely 180 degrees from where i should have been walking.  so i decide ill take the metro back to atwater and start again.  only when i get on the metro, the car has electrical failure and wont start so now im stuck walking.  walking was time consuming and i wanted to be there for the shofar service.  unfortunately, i didnt quite make it intime.  so finally, i get to the synagogue (huge synagogue, seats about 1400, about 1200 were there).  and eventually i find a permanent seat and machzor and the serviceis really nice with like, a small 8 person choir like the one they had at the synagogue in paris.  

a fireman from westmount was there to represent the volunteers that helped from the westmount community and all over the countries, in nyc, so that was nice.  and the rabbi's speech was about religion not being an excuse for evil.  without any direct reference to islamic radicalists, he basically tried to say that any religion does not preach hate and that religions teach people to be g-dly and that there is no greater defacement of G-d's name than to commit acts like this.  basically, he tried to instill that we shouldnt hate other people of any faith, colour, gender, etc, as long as they are truly acting g-dly.  he said that religion can be used for evil in the wrong hands and as an example, took the midrash story of cain and abel.  we know cain murdered abel, but if there had never been such thing as murder prior to abel's death, how did cain know what to do to murder abel?  the answer was religion.  just before, cain saw adam preparing a sacrifice by slitting the throat of the animal.  cain then deduced that he could kill abel by slitting his throat.  it was the religious act that adam did with the sheep that caused cain to murder abel.  religion only serves purpose if we use it correctly to become more righteous.  that it all starts with humanity first, not G-d.  that G-d was there when the planes crashed into the buildings, but humanity wasnt.  extremely interesting.

the thing that hit me the most in the last week was after adon olam and after the benediction prayer, rabbi gelman led the congregation in singing the first and last stanzas of "america the beautiful."  imagine, 1200 canadian jews singing america the beautiful in show of support for the states. it wasnt just about standing behind america, but standing behind as mankind. they turned the song from american to global.  and as they broke into chorus, i got one of those feelings you get in your stomach, the words wouldnt come out of my mouth, and i almost broke out crying.   where i was, who i was with, didnt matter, we were all united.  i thought of my family back home and how they were celebrating the holidays without me again, how far it was, yet how close it is.  how lucky we are for everything we have. yom kippur is next week and we spend the day repenting for our sins, but we never know when our time is and thus, everyday is a day to make sure we are the people we want others to think of us as.  and as they continued the song, i thought about how its not just that im not the person i want others to see,  its that others dont see the person that i am.  definitely, this rosh hashanah has probably caused me to be more introspective than past years

and so i hopped the metro back home as easily as it should have been to get there to begin with and just chilled in the apartment, by then it was around 3.  and since then, its been some lounging around, dave has traded nights with john, so he can cook another rosh hashanah dinner, so hopefully that'll be good (although i was quite impressed with my cooking last night).  tomorrow is another day at shul and a bit more of reading...

oh, and i fixed my wah pedal by putting in another battery and now it sounds excellent instead of non-existent.

18/09/01(1am)-i can honestly say that sunday was a do nothing day.  basically, i sat in a laundromat for half the day, waiting for my clothes to wash and dry and attempting some french in between.  im convinced im starting to think in franglais.  when i think, some of the words in my phrases are french words sometimes.  sunday night was a chill night.  me seth and dave ended up going out to frappe, splitting a pitcher and shooting a few rounds of pool before heading home.

today seemed like a wasted day.  maybe its because it started at 9am and only had 2 classes...got up for my 930 govt of canada class, where schultz was talking about the canadian constitution.  from there it was a hop skip and jump to french where my mrs. cipollini teacher was rambling about the vocab in the pictures and then made me read the assigned piece on my apartment that i wrote at the laundromat :P  had some lunch at tiki ming at shatner, spilled chinese all over my new pants, and then headed downstairs to see the stock quotes on the big screen.  i was glad it wasnt as bad as the 10% drop they predicted, probably only about 6.5% drop instead.  could have been a lot worse, but theres probably a lot of people who decided to hold instead of sell.  now is the time to buy stocks.

leave shatner to macroecon to find out that the prof cancelled class today so basically i had a free period.   so,  i hopped the metro for 20 min and headed to the IGA in hampstead cause we needed kosher meat and challah for rosh hashanah.  easy ride, easy to find what i wanted (cause you cant find any jewish and kosher foods downtown here), so i was able to get a plain and a raisin challah, and the chop meat, chicken breast, and brisket i needed.  came home and started work right away on dinner.  tonight was my night to cook and since it was the first night of rosh hashanah, i also wanted to make a homey, special dinner.  so i made sweet and sour brisket with a great sauce, potatoes, and string beans.  very very good, and we topped it with a bottle of wine and traditional apples and honey (and the challah), and i also got candles, so we were able to light the candles and say all the blessings, it was really nice, particularly since i could celebrate with my roommates since i wasnt able to be with my family. having to do the dishes on the other hand wasnt pleasant.

tomorrow, im going to congregation shaar hashomayim in westmount, the synagogue that i went to to recite my haftorah last year.  they're letting me go for services as well as reciting my haftorah this saturday.  that should be fun again.  last year was the fifth anniversary and i did it better infront of a large group of strangers than a smaller group of people i know.  this year will be my six year anniversary, hopefully ill do as well.  and i gotta get up at 8-815 tomorrow am, so thats not gonna be fun cause i wanna make sure im there for the shofar blowing.  still, im glad im gonna go because i havent gone to services in a while and i like going to services from time to time, makes me feel renewed.  besides, who knows what girls i might see there ;)  but High Holy Day services are always packed so i hope i find a seat.  dave just told me hes not gonna go cause its too early for him, so im a little bummed cause i didnt want to go myself, but im not even sure if hillel is having anything on campus, so im gonna go to shul instead.  

and so, tonight starts rosh hashanah for the year 5762.  it seems like just yesterday that i was celebrating my first new years away from home  the year just flew right by before i even knew it, and 1/4 my years here are already over.  already it saddens me.  theres so much this year that i have to be thankful for- the health of my friends and my family and all those little insignificant prayers i say every night that arent so insignificant because they come true every day.  its a lonely world, but the man upstairs always pulls through when you need her.  and then theres the things im not so thankful for, the things you always wonder what retribution had been done to you for- probably the most recent one was the new york/pentagon attacks.  you assume it happened for a reason, but certainly an attack on mankind isnt something you necessarily thank G-d for carrying out.  rosh hashanah starts the 10 day period in which we start repenting our sins and try to show that we can improve on our human fallacies.    the year is new and just like our nation, we continue rebuilding in the cycle.  the round challahs we eat especially for these holidays, they represent the circle of life and we dip it into the honey for a sweet new year.  as the months progress towards the next year, i wish everyone who reads this site a happy and healthy year to them and their families and may their lives only be filled with sweetness.

L'shanah tovah tikateyvu v'teychateymu. (May you be inscribed and sealed in The Book of Life for a good year.)

15/09/01-its been a couple of days now and ive tried to allow myself to get on with some semblence of normalcy to my life.  dont get me wrong, im still pessimistic of whats to come, but i dont see that ill be benefiting myself by dwelling on my initial reaction.  wed night, dave and i went to a candlelight vigil, thursday we talked a little bit about the war powers act and presidential power in this type of situatiuon in american politics, my french history prof still never made mention about it, thursday we all stayed home.

friday, my canadian politics class was previously cancelled, only i forgot and ended up waking up for a cancelled 930 class.  so in french we talked a lot about tuesdays events in french (since basically thats the only language we speak in class) and in the middle of class, the entire university had two minutes of silence at 11am.  i was gonna  ask katherine, this girl in my french class over for dinner, but she wasnt there, so i went to the bookstore, bought my final textbook that came in, went to lunch and watched on the bigscreens at shatner, some of the prayer services both in dc and ottawa.  maybe im wrong, but when the whole world mourns at once, doesnt that leave us vulnerable to enemy attack? thats what an enemy is...they're not sympathetic to you and when you're vulnerable, doesnt that leave you open?  anyway, PM chretien had some good comments to say and then the governor-general introduced the US ambassador to canada, paul cellucci, who spoke and then i had to go to class.  macroeconomics basically dealt with some of the economic impact this will have, but i dont even know what he was talking about half the class cause it seemed irrelevant.  finally got home, chilled around a while and then went to dinner at this vegetarian restaurant with john, dave, tim, and like 8 other people, la faim du monde.  interesting if you like vegetarian food.  came back from there and didnt really do much the rest of the evening.  i think i passed out on my bed around midnight and woke up at 130pm, which is good cause im getting sick again and luckily havent gotten miserably worse.  cross my fingers.

in response to the article that many americans have been sending around the internet as of late:  it was written by a canadian news commentator named Gordon Sinclair, and is titled "The Americans."  what many americans dont know is that Sinclair had passed away in 1984 and that that piece was actually read on 5 June 1973, when US troops were pulling out of vietnam.  shortly after the speech was read, itwas entered into the Congressional Record and americans all over were requesting to hear it.  28 years later, that speech has resurfaced and again, americans all over are passing it around the net.  timely piece, eh?

in addition, my favourite editorialist, e.j. dionne of the washington post had written the following in yesterday's post.  just remember, we're humans first and everything else second.  we can't allow whatever we are secondly to eclipse our passion to live life as humans first.  humans first, americans second.  peace now.

By E. J. Dionne Jr.
Friday, September 14, 2001; Page A37 [The Washington Post]

Terror is designed to paralyze. It succeeds when a country loses confidence in itself -- when it gives up what it values most. "The resolve of this great nation is being tested," President Bush declared. Indeed. But how do we define resolve?

We should resolve to catch and punish the terrorists -- and to punish those who harbored or trained them. We should discover whether we could have known that this was coming, and how we might be warned the next time.

But our central resolve must be to go on being Americans, to remain a people who cherish our liberties and never allow a small, mad group to push us into questioning the value of freedom.

That thousands -- firefighters and office workers, stockbrokers and janitors -- are buried under concrete and steel from an act both evil and insane provokes rage. It prompts the desire to do anything to avenge, to prevent, to protect. "When you're in this type of conflict," Senate Republican Leader Trent Lott said Wednesday, "when you are at war, civil liberties are treated differently. We cannot let what happened yesterday happen in the future. We're going to have to be prepared to take whatever action is required."

Of course we cannot let this happen again. But protecting rights cannot be seen as a sideshow or a hindrance. "We will win this war," the president declared yesterday. Part of winning will be to remain ourselves.

In the immediate aftermath of the attack, Sen. Richard Shelby of Alabama was among the first to declare us in the midst of "total war." The war metaphor is apt because this should be viewed primarily as a crisis of foreign policy, not as an event that challenges the fundamental soundness of our domestic institutions.

If the challenge is seen in terms of foreign policy, the logical approach is to root out terrorist networks and, as the president said, to hold foreign nations accountable for nurturing them. That points not to symbolic airstrikes as a form of revenge but to a much more difficult course. In coalition with allies if possible, the purpose should be to destroy as much of the terrorist infrastructure around the world as we can.

But a war by terror is not the same as a war of invasion and territorial control. "Total war" implies a domestic mobilization of resources and a temporary suspension of normal life. We should mobilize new resources. But the paradox is that the suspension of normal life is precisely what terrorists seek.

That's why it's important that Sen. Joseph Biden, the chairman of the Foreign Relations Committee, warned just hours after the assaults that "if we alter our basic freedoms, our civil liberties . . . we will have lost the war before it has begun."

No one pretends that we are the same as we were before Sept. 11. But winning this war means resisting the idea that America will never be the same again. It means insisting that our nation can be both tough and democratic, that we can guard both public safety and liberty. That is our history. We should not renounce it now.

Of course there will be large changes -- in airline security and immigration checks at our borders. A commission headed by former senators Gary Hart and Warren Rudman tried earlier this year to convince us of the urgency of defending ourselves at home. We will, too late for the victims of these attacks, now take this call seriously. We will no longer write off as a flight of Hollywood fantasy the possibilities of chemical and biological terrorism.

The mood now is not so much bipartisan as nonpartisan. That is appropriate. But this mood will not last if the desire for national unity in the face of a specific threat is used by anyone to bull through a partisan or ideological agenda. These attacks made our debates over taxing and spending seem trivial. They did not make them go away. Nonpartisanship -- on budget matters especially -- must be built on genuine compromise, or it will disappear.

But above all, we cannot forget that this terror is, as British Prime Minister Tony Blair put it, "perpetuated by fanatics who are utterly indifferent to the sanctity of life." They are not typical, and this is not a typical war. Americans should never allow fanatics to create a climate of mistrust in our country so deep that we forget who we are, what we value and how we should live.

12/09/01(1145pm)-

i have a feeling that with what has happened and whats to come, we just might shape our way into armageddon...the way everyone has envisioned it. imagine- weve screwed ourselves over with the arab world (israeli bias), weve screwed ourselves over with the chinese (spy plane), weve screwed ourselves over with russia (ABM treaty violation)...if you read the article linked below (which i recommend reading), this is going to be a showdown between eastern vs. western cultural philosophies

despite the fact that ive been living here for a year now and have absorbed and adopted canadian culture as part of my own, it was yesterday's catastrophe that brought me back to my american blood. sifting through all my political thoughts, my political analysis, what i know, what i believe in, im convinced this is the beginning of something greater, something of magnificant proportions. as today has progressed, ive literally become more and more terrified as to the future of what humanity is about to offer. for the first time, my usual optimistic, yet realistic self has turned to pessimism and for the first conscious time i can remember, my faith in the arrival of the messiah has expanded to more than merely a part of my set of religious beliefs, but actual faith as well.

this monday night will start the jewish holiday of rosh hashanah. last year, not being home to celebrate the holiday with my family was different and a bit of a change, but this year, not being able to celebrate the holiday with my family will hold new meaning. for those who didnt know, rosh hashanah is the head of the jewish new year. in addition it is when we believe G-d opens the Book of Life for judgement. over the course of the next ten Days of Repentence, we not only wish others a happy new year, but also wish that they may be inscribed in the Book of Life. this ten day period ends on yom kippur, the day of atonement, where we fast and pray for forgiveness for our sins because that is the day when we believe G-d closes the Book of Life. as you may imagine, i will be celebrating the holiest days of the jewish calendar this year, in a way that i've never celebrated it before- in a context that i've never celebrated it before. fortunately or unfortunately for my other two jewish roommates, it is very possible that neither of them will be returning to their homes in NYC.

i hope that this will not turn into humanity's darkest hour, but may G-d be with us through whatever course of events we persue.
i miss all of my friends, all of my family, and i hope you are all safe, wherever you may be.
my love is with all of you
spencer

12/09/01(845am)- To those who wouldn't mind taking a ride to Rhode Island (or those who already live there)--- 

Tonight, 9/12, a band called rane is playing at The Living Room in Providence. Rane is a jam band from outside of Hartford with musical influences ranging from Bela Fleck to DMB to Rusted Root to Phish to Pink Floyd. Their sound is amazing, their music is magical, their lyrics will touch you. 

I am asking anyone who is not going to a vigil or prayer service tomorrow night to please try and go to this rane concert. This following is from an email I received last night from the band's listserv: 

Hey everybody... Everyone in the Tides family wishes you and your loved ones the best at this tragic time. RANE's performance at The Living Room in Providence tomorrow night WILL go on as planned. Here is the official word from Dan [rane's bassist]: 

It has come to my attention that many of you have been inquiring about [t]omorrow's show at the Living Room in Providence. RANE will NOT be cancelling this show. The events of today, September 11, were tragic. My mother worked on the 64th floor of what was the first World Trade Tower. In what is perhaps the greatest miracle of my lifetime, she did not work today. The events that transpired in New York, Washington, and throughout the nation have hit home with me in particular, as I know they have with all of you. 

While I am not the staunchest supporter of our president, I must say that I agree with him in one thing that he said today. The end goal of terrorism is Terror. If we stop the normal course of our lives due to terrorism, we have allowed the terrorist to succeed in inciting fear and controlling our behavior. 

Today was tragic, and I will be the first to say that we MUST mourn. We must take time out of our lives to honor those who no longer have theirs. However, we must NOT let the normal course of our lives be disrupted, and we must not cancel the truest expression of the many emotions that we experience in this lifetime: our art. 

Fight back in the most peaceful way that one can. Be fearless. See you tomorrow. 

Thank you all.

 - Dan and the rest of RANE 

Please, I encourage people to show up at this concert and make a statement that you won't let your normal lives be deterred. You might be in for one of the most powerful musical performances this band will give. 
Thank you. 
Spencer

11/09/01-"I read the news today, oh boy..." ~ "Day in the Life," The Beatles

short recap, moving in was great, last saturday was a 50 person party in our apartment.  went really well.  classes= French History to 1789, Government & Politics of the U.S., Government of Canada, Macroeconomics, Oral and Written French I.  yesterday was both margarets birthday and my roommate john's birthday.  room all set up and eventually ill get a few still pics up because my webcam software doesnt function right for the streaming video software (i dont believe it impacts netmeeting though).  theres one of me about last wed or thurs.  but thats it for now.

CTV (Canadian Television)~ "With the complete evacuation of the Ottawa airport, and the shutdown of the rest of the airports in the country, what will happen now?  We are so dependent on the united states" ~ 12pm, September 11, 2001.

the inevitable and the unthinkable has happened.  after a restless nights sleep thinking about updating the page and what to do with it in the meantime, seth started knocking on my door really loudly around 10am.  since i wasnt getting up til 1030, i got up, opened my door and he said "you might want to come downstairs."  who knew.  i went downstairs and theres john already there, watching cnn and im seeing something about a plane crashing into the world trade center.  so two things cross my mind and didnt connect at first cause i was still in fuzzy mode.  1. plane crash in tall, famous building 2. 1993 terrorist attack on WTC.  and a couple of seconds later, they both clicked as i saw the damage on the side of the building.  and watching the replay of the second plane ripping through the south tower of the WTC looked like something from a movie.  even before cnn started making the analogy later in the day, as they switched to the plane that hit the pentagon, i started thinking, this sounds like its coming right out of tom clancy's book, executive orders.  and that started my day.

seth and dave are both from nyc, although dave was at class.  so seth started making his phone calls, and johns mom in DC works in the justice dept, so she was evacuated and john couldnt get a hold of her.   seth and i both skipped american politics, although i went to french history at 1.  before 1, we were watching cnn, i was online and watching CTV in my room.  canadians stepped up their RCMP forces, closed airports, and sealed borders (because its very possible that canada is harbouring more terrorists).  went to class and on the way back, i stopped to get the new jamiroquai cd.  pretty good.  so i was walking down ste. catherine street and i see people flocked around planet hollywood.  so i go over, and everyone is watching cnn on the tv.  i keep walking and theres people watching outside of the musiqueplus studios.  and the ticker over the studio reads "Imagine all the people, living life in peace...Quand les hommes vivent d'amour, il n'y aura plus de misère...All we are saying, is give peace a chance..."  and i thought, what would lennon think...  from there, i came back the apartment and started giving my political analysis on the doings.  and since ive always held my site to be a political forum, im going to put my reactions up here.

first off, i implore people to read this precis by Samuel Huntington, Eaton Professor of the Science of Government and Director of the John M. Olin Institute for Strategic Studies at Harvard University.  its called "The Clash of Civilization," and can be found here.  i had spoke about this article in my last update in june and much of my political attitude on what happened today stems from this article.

in the article, huntington talks about the next world war being east (ie islamic-buddhist states) vs. west (judeo-christian states)...and that its not going to be a ground/air war like our previous wars, but a guerrilla war, one that the united states does not know how to fight, nor how to counter...

after reading that article last year, i tried reconciling that analysis with religious belief and its possible that this could be the one. some apocalyptical stuff ive read talked about a guy with a name similar to osama that was the anti-christ and, stuff ive read about hebrew bible code has predicted stuff like this. i could see something like this leading to bigger terrorist battles. and we dont use terrorist tactics to fight back unfortunately. how do you fight a war you dont know how to fight? what happened today is only going to be the beginning...

president bush (as would any president) sounds good saying we're going to hunt down terrorists and eventually getting into retalliatory measures but islamic extremist groups have a completely different warfare mindset and tactic than we western militaries have. people are stunned how today could have happened, but groups we're talking about arent the mickey mouse terrorist groups. these are groups who dont see themselves as "cowardly" because the purpose of fulfulling their mission is to glorify allah.  the level of tactical sophistication is high in these groups and like i said, its not a front lines military we're talking about, its guerrilla/terrorist tactics and i forsee more sophisticated terrorist attacks that we wont be able to prevent and our means of retaliation does not combat the warfare they are presenting because they have no ONE organized side as the US does. and thats why this new war will be nearly impossible for us to win.  the next war is impossible for us. we have a side. they dont.

we've moved into a new age of warfare.  president reagan and presidents bush had the right idea with the starwars defence plan.  however it was a unilateral decision and it still would have had implications on diplomatic ties regardless if tests were a success or not.  and yet still, the duality of the problem of diplomacy vs. counter-nuclear terrorism is unsettling.  because the starwars system would be our only line of external defence in the new age of warfare.   that was one thing i agree with bush on... nukes from terrorists are next.  they're going to create a short term and a long term plan, but whats to come over time is going to be a harsher reality...and we're not ready to mentally and physically deal with it...

whats left? prayer, hope, and donate blood.